Welcome back!! As many of you have seen I got an avatar. If you don’t know what that is it’s a little person who I made to resemble me. If you would like to make one then you can click on the link I put on the bottom of the page to make your own! Everyone is different, there is an so many different things that make up who we are. For me I enjoy dancing and riding horses but I also am intelligent, motivating and a happy person. My avatar doesn’t just represent what I look like it also represents who I truly am. I have brown hair, freckles and blue eyes. But my avatar also shows how I dress and what colors I like. I encourage you to make your own avatar, it’s not only fun but can show people who you really are!!When making the avatar try to make it realistic but fun and interesting. In order to create a good avatar make sure to find a balance between them. I personally think if your interested in making an avatar you should go to the link that I made mine because it is the easiest website I used in my personal preference, the name is FaceYourManga. Sometimes taking your avatar and putting it on your website can get confusing but it is worth it because your avatar truly shows who you are.
Face Your Manga – the avatar link
Hi, my name is Ale’a I like to describe myself as funny, creative, athletic, and positive. I am Hawaiian, Mexican, Samoan and Filipino. I enjoy playing basketball, football, lacrosse, and volleyball. I am a huge fan of Disney and sports. Things I like to do at home is, arts/crafts and bake. I really like your post, #1 because you feed the reader information about yourself/ things you enjoy (riding horses & dancing). #2 because no only me, but if lots and lots of other people got the opportunity to read this post it is really relateable, and im sure people would have a connection with this post instantly, whether its the characteristics about you or your favorite things. #3 because your title is an attention grabber. Its simple, easy, and basic which is a good thing, also because a reader that doesnt know much about you (like me) will most likely read this post. I noticed a few things that you could perhaps fix. The first thing is that to add more stuff about your personality. I think this should be something you fix because you title says, “Who I am” so people are looking forward to read things about you, and I saw a very little variety of things you have interest in. Otherwise, besides that your writing was absolutely amazing!!!
Thank You!
Thanks for the awesome feedback, when I read over my post I realized some of the things you said I could of improved on. Next post or essay I write that’s similar to this I will definitely improve my weaknesses on my writing. I also thought that your comment was very informative and thank you once again!
-Jesse-
Come and read some more of my blogs at http://jessepgms24.edublogs.org